At this juncture, let me say that I realize the term "she-male" is used for porn purposes (as is Ladyboy, chicks with dicks, etc.), but if I slip and it falls into one of my blogs, don't hate on me. I mean no disrespect.
So, I really want to have sex with a cock. I'll just cut to the chase. It isn't that I'm attracted to men, however. I'm not really interested in men per se at all. The thought of wrestling around with a hairy man or kissing a person with facial hair nauseates me. I do find a pre-op transgendered woman to be hugely appealing. It's the soft, sensual, feminine attraction that just happens to have a functional penis attached that makes me so desperate to have a go. To be fair, I have considered sex with a man, but the lack of attraction makes it difficult. He would have to be very delicate and obviously hairless (not bald!). I've had a drink in a gay bar, got picked up hitch-hiking by a guy who proffered me sex, and even had a random caller asking about a room to let proposition me, but I've never had a cock in my hands (or mouth or ass or...you get the idea). I even spent some time as a video cam person. I had some cam-to-cam moments with women, but most of my customers were guys. It was hot, I'll admit. Watching a guy jerk off while watching me jerk off was sexy. Hey - I love sex! But would I have wanted to be with them in person? I don't think so. Besides, in true sex chat style, as soon as they blew their load, they shut down their cam and were gone, often leaving me to finish alone.
I have tried to find a lady to be with. I even phoned up for an escort in Vegas some years back, but the agency sent a genetic woman and I was totally disappointed. I have also browsed internet search sites for ladies to my liking, but found them a stark world of either gross, fat, old, and manly-looking CDs or professional women. It seems like the only way I'll ever have an experience with a trans-woman is if I pay for it. I'm not opposed to it, but it's certainly not my first choice.
I am beyond excited to take this step, a fantasy I've had since I was a young man. As a child, I wanted to be a woman, so I'm well aware of the duality in my gender composition. I have wondered what it would be like to give head, have my ass filled with a cock, feel the orgasm shudder through the shaft and explode cum inside of me. I've used dildos, but it's not satisfying. My fantasies obviously lean towards being the submissive in the situation, alas, so do many CDs or TGs I've seen on websites. Makes it a bit hard for me to find that special person.
Sorry that this isn't erotica. I never promised my blog would be all sex, all the time. I write here to put my thoughts out, but moreover, to come in contact with others like me. Maybe you're one of those women who I dream about. Or maybe you're simply a guy like me. I read a piece on literotica a few days ago that I swear someone stole from my subconscious. I know I'm not alone. Furthermore, I think that maybe, someday, I might just come across a transgendered woman who I might actually date and have a relationship with. Anything's possible in this world. If you fit the category, drop me a line. :) I welcome all comments. I hope to make some wonderful connections to this world, and not just those from porn site. :p
xo
